首先是「創傷性記憶」。一般認為,恐怖經歷的記憶就像烙印在腦子裡一樣無法抹滅,因此絕對可信,但事實卻是,即使非常強烈,非常深刻的記憶也可能失真。以荷蘭艾力卡監獄囚犯受虐案為例,證人在四十年前和四十年後的證詞有很大出入,有人記錯虐待他的守衛的名字,甚至有人根本忘了自己曾被殘忍對待。同樣的,指認在集中營控制毒氣室開關的「恐怖伊凡」一案也說明身心巨大創傷對大腦的影響:在集中營裡時時刻刻存在著性命攸關的危險,對無時不在的威脅本能地維持高度警戒、體力嚴重透支、精神委靡不振,以及營養和維生素 B 缺乏(可導致思維意識不清),這些不利的條件都會對記憶力造成損害,導致記憶力嚴重衰退。
And if there was eternity, or even the idea of it, then perhaps Anselm was right; all things were possible. And all love? I wondered. I had loved Frank; I still did. And I loved Jamie, more than my own life. But bound in the limits of time and flesh, I could not keep them both. Beyond, perhaps? Was there a place where time no longer existed, or where it stopped? Anselm thought so. A place where all things were possible. And none were necessary.
And was there love there? Beyond the limits of flesh and time, was all love possible? Was it necessary?
The voice of my thoughts seemed to be Uncle Lamb’s. My family, and all I knew of love as a child. A man who had never spoken love to me, who had never needed to, for I knew he loved me, as surely as I knew I lived. For where all love is, the speaking is unnecessary. It is all. It is undying. And it is enough.