Hot, Wet, and Shaking: How I Learned to Talk about Sex

Desire is holy, sex is church, and our bodies are built for pleasure and connection. These are the tenets that Kaleigh Trace lives by and which she explores in these memoirs and essays.

Hot, Wet, and Shaking chronicles Trace’s journey from ignorance to bliss, from being a critically uncool teenager to a successful couple’s and sex therapist, all while weaving together themes of feminism, sex positivity, and disability justice. Writing as a queer, disabled, cisgender woman, Trace lays bare the vulnerability inherent in all of our bodies, the healing intimacy that can be found in loving community, and the endless capacity for humour and play that sex can offer us. Trace laughs at her missteps, forgives herself her errors, and reassures the reader that imperfection is perfect.

Moving from the delight of learning how to orgasm to the grief of living with terminal cancer, Trace welcomes you into her world, inviting you to consider the freedom available to us all when we set aside the shaming pressure of expectation. Will this book teach you ＂how to talk about sex＂? Yes, and then some.

Kaleigh Trace lives in Toronto but dreams of Nova Scotia. Like many writers, she is pulled toward the immutable language of the coastline. Like many therapists, she finds solace in the ocean.

Kaleigh’s written work can be found in The Coast, No More Potlucks, Shameless Magazine, The Huffington Post and on CBC Radio. Her first book, Hot, Wet, and Shaking: How I Learned to Talk about Sex was published by Invisible Publishing in 2014 and won the Evelyn Richardson Non-Fiction Award.

Kaleigh’s therapeutic work centres on the certain truth that our intimate relationships are sites of healing. As a couple’s therapist, Kaleigh has witnessed the transformative power of compassionate love, and her practice promotes this ethic.

Kaleigh has a Masters of Science in Couple’s and Family Therapy and passable punch-needling skills. As a queer, disabled femme, Kaleigh is always curious about your face care routine. Talk to her about your moisturizer.